Infinite possibility and its detractors

I have a butterfly mind.  This was recognised by my primary school teacher as she wrote precisely that in my school report. I may have even mentioned this before in one of my books. This means that I can be completely fascinated and absorbed in a subject one minute but something else completely unintended happens and it distract me until I’m reminded to refocus on the task at hand. It also means that depending on the strength of interest in the current task, I will constantly wander onto something else or stay on track. This ability for me to pay attention to so many different things at once tends to lead to exhaustion and its difficult to have a one track mind. When I do have one as fate would have it, its the time when I need my attention to be in 5 different places at once.

This constant switching is not particularly useful in the working world but it is very good when talking to strangers because you never know what there going to be interested in and can strike up a conversation about all manner of things. Yes I know you shouldn’t talk to strangers because its dangerous, I’m English and all the other things we get indoctrinated about throughout our lives but if you never did that you would never make any friends or do anything cool.

Its also how businesses start and thrive for isn’t networking the bringing together of many unknowns that have a common interest and are working together to achieve a common goal? So you see I have the potential for so many things but is currently underutilised as I love to research, read, watch the world around me to stay informed on new developments, current affairs and all that this world has to offer. However, I hover on the edge of things not knowing how to contribute as others don’t like being shown up by there lack of knowledge and sometimes even morals and integrity for greed is there main motivator and they will stop at nothing until they get what they want. Harvey Weinstein anyone?

So what is a girl to do as you should show your femininity and vulnerability to show that you are a woman but then you are taken advantage of and if you present as masculine you never quite good enough as your just an impostor and you are denying who you really are and that is a sad state of affairs. Women have for too long been second class citizens as we are not as physically strong as men and our vitality decreases as we age where as men don’t in such a dramatic fashion but we are in fact much stronger in a mental capacity than they are. We need to leverage this advantage so that the playing field is levelled for men and women for both should stand side by side to create a fairer more just world.



Like a fine wine, one should get better as they age but it does not always feel like this especially in today’s youth obsessed culture. We forget the values of honesty, modesty and chastity in our efforts to be centre stage all of the time. We need to take time out occasionally to reflect on earlier times to see what they thought was most important as we may learn some important lessons that would otherwise be forgotten in the midst of progress. Just like the current upswing in vinyl sales, we are learning that despite all of the technological changes and improvements, sometimes the old ways are the best but we don’t realise until we stop to look and think. For our eyes are only really opened if we have open minds and hearts to all that is around us. Old wives tales remain in our culture and aural heritage because what they encapsulate is essentially true.  We have to have the foresight to appreciate that they too learnt from their forefathers in a never ending circle of wisdom as we are forever standing on the shoulders of giants.

We are losing a sense of community here in the UK so we are fighting to regain it as that is what makes a better place to live. Shared knowledge, kinship and affiliation bind stronger than money does although blood may be the strongest tie there is. We can learn from other cultures that still have there bonds in place and reinforce our own as well as creating new ones. We can create a better country and have better lives but we have to be willing to accept all people.

As you grow you discard the beliefs and attitudes of childhood like a snake shedding its skin and go into a completely new being that appreciates all that adulthood has to offer. Not just the outward appearances of sophistication like classical music, classic hollywood or even olives and martinis (dry, dirty and with vodka) 😉 but you come to realise that there are horrors of the world like those shown in the Handmaid’s Tale or Patrick Melrose. Gotta love me some Bendy dick Cucumber patch. Yes this is not the usual style of writing one should adopt when trying to make serious points but it more accurately reflects what actually happens inside my mind and its not always appropriate or civilised. Certain impulses have to be controlled so that one appears disciplined and put together at all times even if you want to burst into tears as the emotional torment that exists in your body is so great it wishes to burst though like the aliens in MIB.

Creativity, anxiety and writers block

As I’m learning about myself as I’m such a complex person like we all are, I’m gaining awareness of what makes me tick and how to look after not only my physical well being but my mental health too. Mental health is even more fragile than our physical health as we cannot see yet it is always present in the background. We neglect to look after our minds and then we wonder why we have mental breakdowns, anxiety attacks and get depressed.

Just like there is a thin line between love and hate there is between the creative impulses that are positive and the negative impulses that our brain creates for us. Those with higher intelligence also tend to be isolated for their brains tend to torture them not only with flashes of inspiration but also images of the most horrific nature and its up to there own beliefs etc to stand up and get rid of the those thoughts that are unwarranted and unwanted. This constant fight between good and evil is extremely tiring but most people only see the end result when the person can no longer continue to battle. If only life was as easy as visiting a Pokemon centre to be instantly healed.

When we try to just live with just the positivity though it can feel like we are only experiencing half of what life has to offer. Yes everyone would love a pristine life but that’s an idealistic dream that rarely comes true for is there is no darkness how can you measure how good everything is? The universe is made of opposites and therefore you need to have both in your life to create balance and to understand all things.

Writers block is created when you try to control everything and you have gone as far as you can go in your current situation and something needs to change to reinvigorate your creative juices. It is usually when the darkness has taken hold of you but you are not Darth Vader and need to find a way back to becoming Anakin Skywalker.

The interspersing of pop culture references help to stop an article such as this from being too sombre as you need to tread a fine line between getting peoples attention with a novel idea but also keeping it with the occasional light touch. It also shows that this material is relatable to all ages and is not just a philosophical discussion on the ills of the world. Another aspect is to show how easily the mind can distracted from an unpleasant chain of thoughts to one that is completely different just by the use of different words. Pattern recognition is an amazing technique that can connect all sorts of disparate ideas into a cohesive whole that has a shocking amount of depth that you would not understand if all of those different threads had not been collected together for your later examination.